I had a crazy dream
I was living in a van
parked outside a 7-11
stretched out in my lawn chair
trying to get a tan
I made crazy paintings
and strange bits of art
people actually paid me
and this was my existence
until I got bored
then I bought a Winnebago
I travelled the entire continent
Eventually I arrived in Alaska
and when I stopped to take a pee
there I met a strange man
and I gave him a lift
he knew me way back when
that time I was living the normal life
when I worked some office grind
and was someone’s wife
he knew me then but he never liked me
he always said I was so much more
he once commented he’d never marry
he’d never settle the way I did
So we stopped for ice cream
and we passed a tiny chapel
on the highway to nowhere in particular
he said let’s go to Mexico
and lay in the sand
and so I sold the Winnebago in Anchorage
and we dreamt of getting tans
and waited for the plane to take off
kind of hoping it would never land
I had this crazy dream
he was always in it
never really clear
but somehow somewhere later on
he always followed my path
and lead me back here
we married on a Wednesday
when we arrived back in town
then we went out for beers
laughing about Alaska
and our flight over Mexico
walking home drunk on our life
we stopped to look at the stars
remembering the first time we fell to earth
remembering history
knowing this wasn’t our first
holding my hand he smiled
he said he loved me
he said he always would
through every life we would lead
throughout all the mysteries
then together we jumped into the river
and together we floated out to the ocean
never to be seen again
I had this crazy dream
and he thought I’d forget him
but no, he comes in dreams
so he was wrong
we never married and had eight kids
or had on our own TV show
but yeah never know
the clowns tricked me with the water
they fooled me with the wind
But I’m back travelling the lonely road
back in my blue Winnebago
travelling back to Arizona
looking to buy a silver bullet
and live out in the cactus land
I’m sure he’ll be standing
at some dusty cross-roads waiting
finding me like he always does
we’ll dig a mountain hole
and live under ground
he’ll control the stars
I’ll brew the sticky wine
we’ll get tans with the coyotes
and bury our lives in sand
whatever the outcome
he’ll be by my side
he knows this inevitable fact
until then I think I’ll wake up
and start my travel back
along the highway to nowhere in particular
in no particular rush
I had this crazy dream
but it wasn’t much.
Written by Barbara Doduk June 12, 1999